I reckon as a little girl, chasing the light filled fireflies that filled the air around me. It was almost as if the sky had collapsed down to earth and the stars were at my fingertips. To be immersed in nothing but chasing the light fixtures. Capturing them one by one as if they'd be mine to hold forever. Because at that moment; that's exactly what it felt like. 

If forever was a feeling of a limitless sky continuously expanding, this was it. Knowing that we only get a few glimmers of these moments on this short spin around the planet. The still glass jar of this crystalised creation in my mind holds on to the innocence of a moment in time when every day seemed like a shot in the dark. An aura of endless adventures to be taken sun in and sun out. Every waking day seemed like a new thrill was waiting just around the corner ready for me to grab on. 

Letting the light of these tiny bugs make a home on the palms of my hand. Fearless as they touched my skin. Staring directly into its fire as if my hands coupled together were a lantern becoming one with the night sky and the bugs that filled them. Allowing my child-like mind to be inhibited with the affirmation that spelt out “I am limitless.”  A time when I wasn't scared to let the light in. 

Until one day, you're on an evening summer walk in southern california far from new york where this memory lived. As your feet move you come back to this moment in childhood and as you reminisce you look around and realize;  there is not a single lightning bug infecting the air you're breathing. You think to yourself how did i get here? Who turned those lights out? Was it me? The world? Growing pains? Where along the way did I release the bugs out from my hands?

 Even deeper, you are saddened by how out of reach the stars truly feel for you in that instance. You begin to become envious of that little girl. The one who was able to bring the sky to her eye level. Who was innocent enough to play pretend and believe with all her might that pulling the sky down to earth was possible.

However when you're young you don't realize how few of those moments really exist. And if you're anything like me, although you don't remember much of your childhood you are glad that somewhere inside of you continues to hold on to the hope of small promises embedded in these big moments. The ones we tend to list as insignificant yet the same ones that bring back the wonder of life.